I wake up from the sound of gravel skidding underneath the car. We have arrived.
It must be impossible to arrive without him noticing, the sound is so loud, it pierces through my dream, as I wake up with a gasp. It is a well-disguised security system for intruders on his territory, I think to myself. He appears, always ready to welcome us. To welcome me.
We get out of the car, greet each other. His voice is more energetic, more welcoming, than mine, enough to express a kind of friendliness. Yet it strangely strained, completely calculated almost, as if there’s something behind it I’m not supposed to detect. I hug him around his belly, or I try, my arms aren’t long enough, and they would never become, I later figured out. His belly has taken shape like a yoga ball. It has been completely firm for as long as I can remember.

We witness a person in the midst of a deep grieving process: assembling, analyzing and rearranging puzzle pieces of behavioural patterns… finding endless pathways leading to not one singular point.

Created, directed, written and performed by: Nikolaj Fondt Salzwedell
Co-directed by: Ludwig Sander

Photos by: Gergely Ofner